The Victim Mentality

March 27, 2013

You can tell when you’re in the victim mentality.

It’s easy.

1. The day is almost over and you’ve accomplished nothing.

2. You’re angry.

When you get angry, it may give you a short burst of energy. Showing anger may feel like an expression of masculinity, but it only reveals how easy it is to hurt your feelings.

In fact, it’s worse than steroids; steroids may shrink your balls, but at least you’re still wearing pants.

From about age 6-19, I was addicted to the burst of energy i’d get by being angry. I’m 25 now, so after 6 years of trying to find better, more productive mental states, I still find anger sneaking up on me.

Moving to Austin was one of the most difficult decisions I’ve had to make, and it was one built on a lot of truth. It was also based on a lot of confirmation bias and hype. Someone said there were jobs here, and apparently let the word out to everyone in the country.

It’s not like I don’t have a job. Technically, I have two. But the reality is that right now I live very solidly in the “I’m, but” demographic Jon Acuff talks about in Quitter.

I want to be a lawyer, but I deliver pizzas.

I’m a production assistant, but what i’d really like to do is direct.

I’m a temp data entry worker, but I’d like to start my own business.

You’ve heard these things before. In fact, you may have said similar things 10+ times in the last week.

Maybe you don’t even know what you want to do – but it’s not what you’re doing now.

In any case, it’s easy to get distracted by thinking everyone’s stupid, or how nobody’s giving you a chance, or that God – that universal-vending-machine-in-the-sky, isn’t giving you a solid answer no matter how many times you ask.

Note: God is not a vending machine, but we act like He’s supposed to be when we’re in the victim mentality.

It’s one of the reasons I’m writing this upcoming book. A victim mentality can cripple anyone, regardless of how much potential is inside each of us.

This idea has been so important for me to learn, that it may help anyone else struggling with this mentality, so I’m writing it as a book first.

Get out of this mentality, and you can be creative.

You can enjoy relationships based on who people truly are, not by how much they can further your interests.

You can treat life for the enjoyable journey it was meant to be.

I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. – Ecclesiastes 3:12 NIV

What do you do to get yourself out of the victim mentality?

77 responses to The Victim Mentality

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